By the angst of my own lovely Lee

For anyone who lives outside of Cork the current hurlers strike has become overplayed. It's everywhere. GAA followers from the rest of the country are tired of it and it's fair to say have lost sympathy for both sides involved in the dispute but for the people of Cork it is a tail with more twists and turns then a Hollywood blockbuster for those of you not particularly familiar with the situation I would liken to the film Star Wars.


Let me explain, The force is hurling and it is strong in Cork and has been for decades, there has been balance and happiness coming from All-Ireland victories and provincial success but this balance was disrupted when an Emperor (Frank Murphy) came to power and looked to control the force all for himself he commands a loyal but ultimately powerless group of storm troopers made up of county board delegates who enforce his orders but the most power was given to his favourite apprentice Darth Vader (Gerald Mc Carthy) whose job it was to control the unruly rebels and ensure continued success of the empire. All of this is overseen by the Emperor from the impenetrable Death Star (Parc Ui Chaoimh).

This was fine for a number of years until recently when the unruly rebels finally rose up against Darth Vader led by the fresh faced young Jedi Luke Skywalker (John Gardiner) who was shown his true potential for disruption by the wise Donal Obi Wan Cusack, Luke and Obi wan formed an alliance with a hot shot cocky pilot Han Solo (Sean Og O Hailpin) and his sidekick Chewbacca (Diarmuid O Sullivan) and 2 droids C3PO ( Tom Kenny) and R2D2 (Joe Deane), I know there was a princess in the original but it’s not exactly like the film is it?

So this small group of rebels attacked the death star to bring down the evil emperor and Darth Vader. They did this by showing the good people of Cork that they don’t have to settle for the emperors way any more that maybe if they all group together in a sign of strength the emperor and Vader will give up and retire and power will be given back to the rebels but this emperor is mad with power and will not release his vice like grip on the empire.

In the film the empire did eventually fall after sustained attacks from the rebels but they also needed Darth Vader who having seen the error of his ways eventually sacrificed himself to overthrow the emperor. Obviously this is all fantasy except for the last part, if this is to be brought to an end Gerald Mc Carthy will have to sacrifice himself which will give power back to the rebels.

Seriously according to the players, for this dispute to end Gerald McCarthy will have to step down as manager then the 2008 hurling panel will return and everyone will live happily ever after. That’s not going to happen. What manager will be happy to take over a team that has shown themselves to be unmanageable, that would rather talk to the media then each other, that have become so unified that it would be almost impossible to exert your authority over them. Also if a new manager is to be picked, both the players and the county board will want someone they can influence which is just installing a puppet who has no real control.

The alternative is a player manager working in conjunction with a team manager but again this will not run smoothly. I can foresee a falling out over who gets the best seat on the team bus or who gets to wear the bainesteoir jacket.

Allegedly the players proposed there should be a team of almost 20 who manage the squad, I say allegedly because in this dispute no one is giving any straight comments, It was proposed that to succeed an inter county team would need a manager, selectors, player liaisons, analysts, fitness coaches, Life coaches, personal groomers and a psychic. Alright the last few are made up but are they on to something. The modern game has evolved to such an extent that its almost as intense as many professional team sports. On the other hand is this further proof that this dispute has descended into farce.

This dispute will be resolved at some stage by either side giving in, be it the rebel alliance retiring or Emperor Murphy resigning. I have no sympathy for either side involved it has been reduced to a battle over who’s pride will get damaged the least. The only people who will really lose out will be the Cork GAA fans, they deserve better than this. The players blame the county board, the manager blames the players. It’s a vicious circle it reminds me of a saying “A bad workman blames his tools”. Well, this dispute is full of Tools.